FIRE JOE MORGAN: I'm Going to Keep Doing This Until Someone Tells Me to Stop

FIRE JOE MORGAN

Where Bad Sports Journalism Came To Die

FJM has gone dark for the foreseeable future. Sorry folks. We may post once in a while, but it's pretty much over. You can still e-mail dak, Ken Tremendous, Junior, Matthew Murbles, or Coach.

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Saturday, October 28, 2006

 

I'm Going to Keep Doing This Until Someone Tells Me to Stop

Send your "Stop Doing This" requests to:

Stop Doing This
c/o Ken Tremendous
FJM Headquarters/Secret Air Force Nerve Gas Project
Area 54
Utah, USA

It will take weeks for them to get to our underground government bunker. And in that time, I will link to, and snip words from, thousands of identical articles about David Eckstein, like this one.

Either click the link and read Tom Verducci's version of the same exact thoughts and feelings that every other sportswriter in the free world has expressed in the last few days, or just read my list of words that are taken from said article, below. That will save some time, and I swear you can get the whole meaning of the article from just reading the word list.

David
Goliath
Faith
Imagination
Heart
Soul
5-foot-7
165 pounds
Clean-scrubbed
Cub Scout
"barely qualifies for a razor"
"one of the most clutch players I've ever seen"
"Tigers centerfielder Curtis Granderson turned a routine out -- by that pest Eckstein, of course -- into a rally-starting double when he flat out fell in centerfield"
(Isn't it amazing how Eckstein continues to receive credit for that, even when the writer of the article always notes how Granderson just flat-out fell down? How is this because of Eckstein being a "pest?")
Size [does not matter]
Magnitude [of a person's heart]
Little dude
Little man
Role model
Good little player
Good player
Idol
Not...big enough to make it
Idol
Small
Stature
Very big man

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posted by Anonymous  # 2:13 PM
Comments:
Thanks to Matthew for the tip. And continuing thanks to everyone else who keeps sending me links to these things.
 
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